This would be funny...if it weren't so often true
No flight ever leaves on time unless you are running late and need the delay to make the flight.
If you are running late for a flight, it will depart from the farthest gate within the terminal.
If you arrive very early for a flight, it inevitably will be delayed.
Flights never leave from Gate #1 at any terminal in the world.
If you must work on your flight, you will experience turbulence as soon as you touch pen to paper.
If you are assigned a middle seat, you can determine who has the seats on the aisle and the window while you are still in the boarding area. Just look for the two largest passengers.
Only passengers seated in window seats ever have to get up to go to the lavatory.
The crying baby on board your flight is always seated next to you.
The best-looking woman on your flight is never seated next to you.
The less carry-on luggage space available on an aircraft, the more carry-on luggage passengers will bring aboard.
More love related Murphy laws...
The amount of love someone feels for you is inversely proportional to how much you love them.
Money can't buy love, but it sure gets you a great bargaining position.
The best things in the world are free --- and worth every penny of it.
Every kind action has a not-so-kind reaction.
Nice guys (girls) finish last.
If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.
Availability is a function of time. The minute you get interested is the minute they find someone else.
Why is Murphys Law always so true? *argh* Oh I hate this!
It's the same damn thing with toast...if you drop your toast...it WILL fall butter side down...
If you start to look like your passport picture then it's time to go on holiday!
(Not exactly Murphy's law, but I like it...)
When your passport's getting on to 10 years old then perhaps that pictures starts to look better all the time
Murphy's Original Law
If there are two or more ways to do something, and one of those ways can result in a catastrophe, then someone will do it.
If anything can go wrong -- it will.
Murphy's First Corollary
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
Murphy's Second Corollary
It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
Quantized Revision of Murphy's Law
Everything goes wrong all at once.
Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value.
The Murphy Philosophy
Smile... tomorrow will be worse.
Leighs Law - if you can't control it then don't waste time worrying about it as everything happens for a reason (even if its just to make someone else laugh )