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OFFICIAL MALE SENSITIVITY TEST

Travel Forums Off Topic OFFICIAL MALE SENSITIVITY TEST

1. Posted by Wocca (Inactive 3745 posts) 11y

This comes off another site, so let's see how sensitive the TP males really are: cool:

1. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared:
A. Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship.
B. Your blood-test results.
C. Five tequila slammers.

2. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
A. Healthy, creative love-play.
B. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would agree to.
C. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to ever find out about.

3. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:
A. Lovemaking.
B. Screwing.
C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town.

4. You time your orgasm so that:
A. Your partner climaxes first.
B. You both climax simultaneously.
C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center.

5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is:
A. The best part of the experience.
B. The second best part of the experience.
C. $100 extra.

6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:
A. Of no influence on your affectionate feelings for her.
B. Not a problem, she can join your gym.
C. A conservative estimate.

7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:
A. A myth.
B. An oxymoron.
C. A moron.

8. Foreplay is to sex as:
A. An appetizer is to entree.
B. Primer is to paint.
C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.

9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
A. "I hope we can still be friends."
B. "I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep."
C. "Welcome to Dumpsville. Population, YOU."

10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy.
B. Is uptight and a waste of time.
C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.

Evaluating Results:
If you answered "A" more than 7 times, check your pants to make sure you really ARE a man.

If you answered "B" more than 7 times, check into therapy. You're a little confused.

If you answered "C" more than 7 times, "YOU DA MAN!"

2. Posted by Cupcake (Travel Guru 8468 posts) 11y

HAhahahaha!
That is a good one!
:)

3. Posted by Wocca (Inactive 3745 posts) 11y

And for the " Most Romantic First Lines":

These are entries to a Washington Post competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line...but the least romantic second line.

Love may be beautiful,love may be bliss,
But I only slept with you because I was pissed.

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is ,I met your brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
The sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.

Kind, intelligent, loving, and hot,
This describes everything you are not.

I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes,
Darn, I'm good at telling lies!

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife,
Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming...
That's why I always wake up screaming.

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe "Go to hell!"

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime....