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Would you watch that?

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11. Posted by tway (Travel Guru 7273 posts) 10y

I'd definitely watch it. I love documentaries, and my favourite sites to visit on a trip always seem to involve death of some sort - cemeteries, catacombs, church tombs, war memorieals and museums, jails, you name it.

It's fascinating to think that, even just 50 years ago (let alone 200 years ago), death was a common thing - everyone had family members, young and old, who'd died. And everyone had a way of dealing with it. Today, death is uncommon and santtised - and no one know how to deal with it anymore.

Can I come to the premiere???

12. Posted by mtlgal (Full Member 1179 posts) 10y

I have definitely become desensitized to death. When I first started work at hospitals, my patients' passing away was quite emotionally disturbing. I still remember the first time I witnessed a patient dying right in front of my eyes. I was traumatized and couldn't function for the rest of the day. Granted, it wasn't a very peaceful death I had witnessed, but the gagging, gasping, eyes-bulging kind. Now, the death of a patient doesn't evoke more reaction from me than crossing a name off my list of patients. It sounds very cold-hearted, but it would be way too emotionally draining to work in such an environment if we don't because desensitized after a while. I'm lucky in the sense that I work at acute care hospitals where the patients don't stay for long before going home, transfered else where, or die, so I don't get to become attached to any of them.

Seeing death all around me does make me want to live life to its fullest and not take anything for granted. It has also made me quite a hedonist.

13. Posted by Hien (Moderator 3906 posts) 10y

I will definitely watch it!!!

<whisper> Psst! Phil, did I say that right? Can I have the money now? </whisper>

14. Posted by Brendan (Respected Member 1824 posts) 10y

What do you mean Tway death isn't as common?

More people are dieing today than there were 200 years ago. Everyone has someone who has died, and everyone is going to die.

Death doesn't really bother me, granted I havn't seen somone tortured to death or slowly die from bleeding or something like that. But I think the trauma wouldn't be the death itself, but the pain and suffering.

Death is normal, there is no reason to fear death or to fight death. My favorite quote on death:

"To die would be a great adventure!" -- Hook
"Death is the only adventure!" -- Peter Pan

15. Posted by tway (Travel Guru 7273 posts) 10y

Quoting Brendan

What do you mean Tway death isn't as common?

Sorry - I really should have specified that, in developed countries (as opposed to developing countries, where people are dying at alarming rates), death isn't anywhere near as common as it was 50 plus years ago. My gradfather, for example, had 13 siblings - and all of 4 actually grew up past the age of 10. Ditto most families of ages past. People died at home, and were exposed at home. Siblings died at birth, or of disease disease at a young age. Death was common in that people had to deal with it a lot - and then get on with living again.

Today, medicine and a better understanding of sanitation and health have relegated death to the ranks of the old. Yes, there are incurable diseases and accidents, but nowhere even close to what it was in the past. And with that switch went our ability to know how to deal with it.

16. Posted by mtlgal (Full Member 1179 posts) 10y

Quoting Brendan

Death is normal, there is no reason to fear death or to fight death. My favorite quote on death:

"To die would be a great adventure!" -- Hook
"Death is the only adventure!" -- Peter Pan

This is a very romantic and very unrealistic view of death and dying. Believe me, death is not an adventure and there's a lot to fear. The most you can hope for is a quick and painless ending to your life. If you have a good life, then you should fight death. There is no shame in wanting to live. Of course, some people are terminally ill and have absolutely no quality of life left, in which case death would be the end of their suffering and should be welcomed. But in this case, the chances of a quick and painless ending is rather remote.

Take my advice (you might thank me one day) - live life to your fullest, and write a living will NOW. I've seen so many cases where the patient does not have a living will and could no longer decide for his/herself, and the life and death decisions rest in the hands of family members and/or medical staff. This may not be the situation you'd want to be in one day.

17. Posted by Isadora (Travel Guru 13926 posts) 10y

I have to agree with both Tina and Viv - death has an unrealistic romantic quality about it, and with modern medicine, medical facilities, hospices, etc - it has been sanitized. On the contrary, I'm not saying those things are wrong or bad. But, they do allow us to admit our friends, family and loved ones into institutions that will make sure their needs are met, relieving us from having to be part of the dying process. We can basically "wash our hands" of having to deal with illness and death if we choose to do so - and many of us "do wash our hands".

When my father was dying, he was admitted to the hospital hospice ward. I was amazed at the number of patients there who's families chose not to, could not bring themselves to, or just didn't care enough to visit their dying relatives. On the flip side of the coin, I slept on a hide-a-bed in my dad's room for almost 2 weeks. He died while I went to his house to feed his cat. But, I was there for the process and there was really no adventure about it.

I wasn't there when my mother passed way, though my father was - she died at home. My father had a "hospital room" set up in their living room so he could take care of her until the end because she wanted to die at home. He cared for her for 3 months while watching her slowly fade away. I admire my dad for his strength. Again, I would not call that an adventure but it definitely was an act of true love.

I also agree with the "Living Will". My dad had one and it was followed. I think they are a good idea for people of any age who travel. I believe in being pro-active in your own life and a "Living Will" is a step in the right direction.

Isa now hands over the soapbox to the next one in line...

18. Posted by Brendan (Respected Member 1824 posts) 10y

Thanks for the clarification Tway. I see what you arer saying.

Mtgal and Isa, I think you completly missed my meaning, I will try again. To me the quote is saying.

"Death is a great adventure." As in, being dead. And it is an adventure because none of us here are dead, no one can say "ooo death? yeah it sucks, all I got was this lousy t-shirt."

We will all reach the end of this life and go on to the next part, what ever that will be. Perhaps nothingness, perhaps the pearly gates, perhaps something unthinkable. I am not romatasizing the process of dieing, the sickness, the slow progress of taking your final breath, slowly going through a painful death.

Mtgal, I am not wishing for death, walking down the middle of the highway. I enjoy everyday, every sunrise, every sunset (generally speaking). But when the time comes I am not going to kick and scream.

The end will meet us all head on, and I think being prepared for that is important. Prepared mentally I mean.

Yes though, a living Will is a really good idea for everyone.

19. Posted by Isadora (Travel Guru 13926 posts) 10y

Quoting Brendan

Mtgal and Isa, I think you completly missed my meaning, I will try again. To me the quote is saying.

"Death is a great adventure." As in, being dead. And it is an adventure because none of us here are dead, no one can say "ooo death? yeah it sucks, all I got was this lousy t-shirt."

I got my t-shirt, didn't you get yours??? I now understand what you meant and thanks for the clarification. Looking at it from that viewpoint - yes, death will be another adventure - as is venturing into any unknown.

But when the time comes I am not going to kick and scream.

The end will meet us all head on, and I think being prepared for that is important. Prepared mentally I mean.

Being prepared mentally is important, but few of us are truly "prepared" at the time. Granted, as we age, the feeling of being invincible begins to fade and duly so. We have lived long enough to realize we are all fragile to a point. We also have more and more things for which to stay alive - family, friends, possessions, etc. We also think there will be time to "prepare" later on down the road - mainly because it is a subject we prefer to avoid and/or ignore. It makes us vulnerable in a sense.

I hope, depending on how death approaches you, that you will reconsider the kicking and screaming thing.

20. Posted by Pardus (Respected Member 2356 posts) 10y

Interesting posts, thank you very much. It's giving me lots of new ideas and angles to approach the topic. I am even setting up shots in my mind already... But first I have to finish off my first project - and co-produce two projects of my classmates... busy times ahead..

Maybe looking at the being prepared aspect - how can one be prepared to die?