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31. Posted by Clanger (Respected Member 202 posts) 10y

I arrived home yesterday. I planned it so my trip ended in May when the weather at home would be a little warmer, the birds would be singing, there is more natural light in a day. Also its a time when there will be festivals, and rallies and BBQ parties and outdoorsy events happening.

After my rough time with jetlag and security checks from hell in America, I was actually glad to be coming home to a bit of normality!

I also posted home lots of bits and bobs, so have those to look forward to opening, I too will be living with my Dad. I havent lived with him for 27 years, so guess how 'different' that will be for the pair of us!!!!

32. Posted by snatterand (Travel Guru 454 posts) 10y

Quoting Clanger

After my rough time with jetlag and security checks from hell in America, I was actually glad to be coming home to a bit of normality!!!!

Well, wait three weeks or so, and we'll see how glad you are... No seriously I totally get what you mean. After all, home is home, and no matter how great everything was while travelling, I was always thinking about how I would do this and that as soon as I got home.

Problem is now that I realize that I didn't appreciate how super lucky I was while travelling!!! I mean, I was on vaccation for 8 months; I could see new, awesome things every day, no responsibilities, no excess use of the brain, total freedom... And just wasn't thankful enough. When I look at my pictures now I'm almost jealous of myself.

//Susanna

33. Posted by JIMOORE (First Time Poster 1 posts) 9y

Great to read comments.The dad of a 24 year old returning home after 50 plus countries.
I think he is excited to be home but a bit fearful as stated.
I like what he has become and i feel he does to.
Tell me three to five things to definetly not do.
I have travelled abck in the day and feared returning to the west.
That was 30 yrs ago

34. Posted by jindy (Budding Member 46 posts) 9y

Going home. It's been interesting reading about everyones experiences of going home. This is an issuse that scares the shit out of me. I have spent a year and a half travelling so far, and have atleast another 2 years planned. Already, I hear news of old friends, most doin what they were doing when I left. Of course I can't wait to see them, there are new little ones to meet and some wicked catching up parties to look forward to when I do finally get there. But then what? I have the same dillema that made me travel in the first place. I am not ready for an office career or uni or any of that crap. I love my life right now, and never want to stop travelling.

I won't have that nostalgia of walking into my old room back home, my mum has packed up, rented the house and gona on her own english teaching travels. And good on her. That is awesome. But where does it leave me? Crashing on my mates couch until I sort out my life. When will that be. Will I be welcome there, will our friendships be the same, with me, as it has been said, talking about my travels. I have already seen people getting bored with my travel stories via email. Half don't even reply anymore. What else is there. Thats all I have experienced for so long. It will be 3 or 4 years in total by the time I head back to the old land of Oz.

Oh well, I shall just keep on partying and worry about it at the time

35. Posted by Clarabell (Travel Guru 1696 posts) 9y

Update:

Returning home helped me to embark on a huge career change, and now I'm studying nursing for the next three years. I finish around my 30th birthday (yikes!) and although I went away for a month this summer before the course started, unfortunatly won't be able to travel, until 2009.

One of the hardest things about coming home is that friends' lives move on at a different pace to your own. Most of my friends now own houses and are starting to settle down and get married and are having babies etc. I'm the only single person, and I rarely see my friends now.

The other really hard thing, is as it gets longer I keep going "this time last year I was scuba diving in warm clear seas...." or whateever. And soon I'll have been back a year and I think that'll be tough, cos sometimes it feels like it was all a dream.

But you've got to try and be positive (and its not always easy). When you come home, you don't have to go back to the exact same life you left (unless it was brilliant), you can try to change it, whether its moving somewhere different, or chahging your career or going back to uni.

Despite the lack of a social life, I'm learning lots ,and busy doing new things, and as the nights draw in and the winter approaches (i hate the cold so much) I can try and be motivated by the fact that at the end of all this I can travel again, when I qualified I should be able to get a job in Australia, no more British winters.

36. Posted by snatterand (Travel Guru 454 posts) 9y

Quoting JIMOORE

Great to read comments.The dad of a 24 year old returning home after 50 plus countries.
I think he is excited to be home but a bit fearful as stated.
I like what he has become and i feel he does to.
Tell me three to five things to definetly not do.
I have travelled abck in the day and feared returning to the west.
That was 30 yrs ago

JIMOORE, I don't think that there are any absolute no-no's. Just show him that you are interested in everything he wants to tell you about, ask questions, about people he met, things he saw, etc. Just don't ask him what he liked most. Because it's impossible to answer. And don't expect everything to be "normal" or just as it was before he went, because it never will be again. But I'm sure you know already...

Good luck!
//Susanna

[ Edit: Edited at Nov 6, 2006 4:44 AM by snatterand ]

37. Posted by attaque46 (Budding Member 16 posts) 9y

wow
it really was somewhat cathartic to read these posts and whinings :) of the same sort I produce for a year now since I've returned.
I never realized that this "coming home" bit is such a wide-spread malaise, sickness even...
This really sounds like therapy of a kind,
relieving your soul,
bitching about how great the travelling was,
and how crapy home really is

It's not crapy, of course, i'm just kidding - it has its perks..
It's just that it's so... unreal.

I felt alive when I was in South America.

The sounds, the smells, the tastes, every sense in my body was reassuring me that I, in fact, am alive.

Now - and it's been a year now, so I should probably look for some professional help :) - I live in a sort of haze - doin' jobs I don't like doin', daydreaming about S.A., daydreaming about returning down there, living there, speaking spanish in my sleep, :) etc.
Someone said that the traveling feels like a dream after a while, like it didn't really happen.. - I feel just the opposite: the reality around me at this moment somehow feels less 'real' than my memories

It really is depressing.
I talked to some people who experienced the similar thing, and we all reached the same conclusion that travelling really is sort of a sickness - you feel the consequences for a long time, some even for a life -
like someone said earlier, during my travels I sometimes longed for home, thinking about my parents, friends, my guitars, books, my bed :) and so on,

but in a matter of hours after returning, I was willing to give it all up in a blink of an eye, just to get back.
It was somewhat depressing, this year (13 months now) of being "home again.
I started wondering and revaluating (sacrilegious although it may seem) the concept of a "home". I know my parents and some of my friends would be very sad to know that, but I really started to believe that home's somewhere else.

[ Edit: Edited at Nov 8, 2006 1:09 PM by attaque46 ]

38. Posted by Clarabell (Travel Guru 1696 posts) 9y

Hi Attaque

I think I know what you mean , especially the confusion over "what is home?".

Maybe one day some psychologist will figure it out, or maybe its pre-determined and genetic, ie you're either a traveller or someone just settles comfortably.

A lot of people I know have no desire to travel, and I do believe they can be perfectly happy just settling down and doing none of it. And fair play to them, if they are lucky enough to be happy with what they've got.

But some of us are not like that! LOL

Clara

39. Posted by john7buck (Respected Member 458 posts) 9y

I know this is a super old thread, but I'm just back from 6 weeks of travel and am back at the old "getting home depression" thing. Wierd, because I actually really like my home, and still live in the town where I grew up so I guess I do have a pretty good notion of "home".

But I think what depresses me is that traveling seems to "chapter-out" your life. Here at home, my life doesn't really have chapters, not to a real noticeable degree anyway (maybe if I got my shit together, stopped traveling, got married, etc., perhaps it would). But I can look back and think about when I was living in NZ, or traveling in South America, or whatever. Those all seem like chapters that are now closed in this book of my life. Depressing. Not that I can't go back to those places, but then, it would be a start to a different chapter.

And so I find myself when I am traveling, trying to take those mental snapshots to try to freeze time and the moment. But then, this just seems to speed things up or at least confirm that the attempt is fruitless. And then I'm home.

I read a book once while traveling by HH the Dalai Lama where he said that "All we can do is use the present well" in reference to having no control of the past or hold on the future. And so I take solace in those words while I'm traveling and again while I'm at home; knowing that one day I'll be on my way again.

I don't know where I'm going with this. Just venting at the readers' expense. Maybe I just truly hate work. It's not that I'm lazy Bob, it's just that I lack motivation. . .

[ Edit: Edited on Nov 22, 2006, at 2:10 PM by john7buck ]

40. Posted by snatterand (Travel Guru 454 posts) 9y

Quoting john7buck

But I can look back and think about when I was living in NZ, or traveling in South America, or whatever. Those all seem like chapters that are now closed in this book of my life. Depressing. Not that I can't go back to those places, but then, it would be a start to a different chapter.

Maybe that is exactly where the problem lies: it's not that you can't go back to a certain place - but it just wouldn't be the same if you did because it is not so much the place that you miss, as it is the things that happened there or the things you felt there, at the time...

I used to live in New Zealand for a year. I really miss that period of time in my life, and I've been thinking about NZ almost every day since I came home (and it's almost three years ago!). I know I can go back whenever I want (almost) and I know I will, at some point - but I'm almost afraid to, because it just won't be the same! I know that I will be dissappointed, in one way or another.

However, I didn't think so much about it while I was travelling South America. Which is assuring, because it sort of means that travelling - in any form - will always "ease the pain" somewhat...

I don't know where I'm going here. Only thing I know is that there is no such thing as "losing your apetite" for travelling. That apetite is always increasing!!!

//Susanna