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goal in life?

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1. Posted by tingo (Full Member 94 posts) 12y

I have this strange feeling these days that I don't have a goal in my life... I started working since a few months in a big international company, mainly IT stuff, and I'm asking myself every day what the purpose of this work is... I'm earning good money, but the work doesn't make me happy at all.

Before, while I was still at university, I never had that feeling, my only goal was to study and get my diploma, and I was happy....
I see all those people going to work every day, spending 2 hours a day in traffic, doing the same thing as me, and they are all completely satisfied with that kind of life. I just wonder if there are any other people who ever had or have that feeling? I just don't know what to do for the moment. I mean I have a good job, I should be happy, no?

While I was still studying, I was also travelling a lot, I studied 3 years in other countries... I think I'm also a bit afraid of settling down. Now that I have a job, I'm kind of fixed to the place I live now, and everybody is expecting from me at this moment to make a nice career at work, have a girlfriend, buy a house... Sometimes I think that's indeed the best thing to do, but then on the other hand I want to travel and see other places, or maybe do some volunteering work ...

What do you think? Should I look for another job?

2. Posted by iloveflyin (Full Member 159 posts) 12y

Hi tingo,
It looks like you are in may alley.
I was aking myself that question, when I reached 40. Most people are in a life-mold- Finish highschool-go to college get a degree or two-get a decent job- marry or find a mate- buy a house- have some kids-retire-die. That, to me, is a boring, boring life. I believe, I owe myself to do something extraordinary - such as traveling around the world- doing something most people don't think of doing, because they unknowingly surrender themselves in the life-mold. I am still owe myself a trip around the world in one weekend, and be the first person to ski in Vietnam. Yeh, you need to put some dressing into your salad; otherwise, just lettuce, and tomatoes, they have no taste!

3. Posted by tingo (Full Member 94 posts) 12y

Hi Iloveflying,
I'm happy I'm not alone with that feeling... I just wonder what did you do then when you started to have that feeling? Did you change something completely in your life? Sometimes I also thing thay travelling is just an escape from reality. Some day you have to return anyway, and you are in the same situation as before...
I agree with you, the life I have now is so boring. Every day the same stuff: I wake up at 7 am, have breakfast, spend 50 minutes to go to work, work until 5.30 pm, spend 50 minutes back home, do some sports or meet with friends or watch tv, and go to sleep again. That kind of life can't make me happy! But what can you do?

4. Posted by Rach-a (Respected Member 368 posts) 12y

Hi tingo,

go out there and do it all!! Travel the world and if you find you don't like your job when you come back - change it. Maybe IT is not for you. Maybe you need another job (maybe to do with travelling, architecture or art combining with your hobbies). You may be more fulfilled in another career. You could always try new stuff/hobbies out, maybe live in another country for a year or two - that way you are away from the norm and can experience different cultures, people, ways of life etc.

As for using travelling as a 'means of escape from reality' I don't believe so. Travelling to me is seeing 'reality' in other countries, it is about exploring, experiencing, enjoying. I would say yes it is away from the norm i.e. going to work til 5:30pm in an office everyday and watching TV in the evenings but it isn't away from reality. I am 25 and single and yes I can relate to people around you expecting to work every day and get married blah blah. I hear it most day's from my mum but I am not going to feel guilty for doing what I wan't to do (and have been wanting to do for ages)!! It is what I am interested in and so therefore will do it. Also who says you have to travel just once. You can travel many times - maybe do temping jobs in between. Maybe you are feeling underchallenged and need to find something challenging to fulfil your needs. i.e. when you were studying for a degree - you were working towards a 'goal' then - something good came out of it at the end whereas in a normal job you feel you have nothing to work towards. I'd say maybe combine your travelling with volunteer work for now. That way you are travelling with a purpose - it is a challenge. Go out there and explore all your options / jobs / hobbies etc. and do what you alone think is best Some websites for volunteer work are below: -

www.i-to-i.com

www.outreachinternational.co.uk

Best of luck

Rach

5. Posted by tingo (Full Member 94 posts) 12y

Thanks again for the interesting replies!
Rach-a you are right, probably IT is nothing for me, but the only problem is that it is not easy to change careers. I've been studying for 6 years, so if I would change to something else, this would mean that I lost 6 years of my life. On the other hand it's impossible to do something for the rest of your life that doesn't make you happy. I like architecture and art, I do some painting and drawing myself, but
I'm not that good at it to start a career in those things, I even don't have the degree...
Anyway, for the moment the only thing that keeps me a bit motivated to continue doing my current job, is that I can go to Chicago for 2 weeks in August. It's still a long time, but I'll try to stay with this job until then. After that I will see, but you are completely right, this job doesn't satisfy me because I'm not working towards anything. I'm just a small part of a big thing and it doesn't give me any feeling of meaning something, or being useful to something in some way...

6. Posted by tingo (Full Member 94 posts) 12y

You know..what I hate about the volunteering work is that you have to pay to be a volunteer :(

7. Posted by leahrb (Full Member 209 posts) 12y

I understand completely the feelings you are having of pointlessness in life.
For me my focus is not this life but the life after earth. I am a Christian and believe that earth is just a temporary residence until we pass away. For those of us whom the Holy Spirit has worked faith in our hearts we will go to spend eternity with Jesus in heaven. For me that is a wonderful and daily encouragement and a promise I cling to daily.
It also sometimes makes me wonder why I am spending quite a bit of time and money on traveling becuase sometimes I think even that is pointless. When I came back to school after my trip to Zambia, Africa everyone was like 'How was your trip?' My answer was usually 'Awesome! absolutely awesome!' Which made me wonder what made it so awesome. I guess the 2 answers for me personally would be
1. Seeing more of God's amazing creation.
2. Meeting people from a different cultures and an entirely different world.

I am studying to be a teacher in a parochial school. I believe that every experience I have especially with meeting new people will help me be a better teacher because I will relate to and understand people better. I won't just be a teacher of the Spanish language or maybe math or English but I will also have the awesome job of sharing the good news of Jesus our Savior with my students and the people I meet along the way. For me Jesus as my personal Savior is the most important thing and sharing that message is a goal that will never end as long as I am alive and breathing.
God's blessing on your search.
If you have any questions please send me a message or an email at xxx

Leah

[ Edit: Sorry, no email addresses in the forum please. ]

8. Posted by bertram (Budding Member 4 posts) 12y

Hey Tingo,
I took the step and left my job to travel. I am now more than 6 months traveling in South America (just Ecuador and Colombia for now) and mostly having the time of my life. Sometimes I think why the hell I am living my life like this and not go back to home have a good job, a nice place to life and friends and family around me....? But then again I have another experience here abroad that I will never forget, like meeting the kindest people, trekking in a National Park for 8 days, climbing a volcano in the snow, experiencing a new culture..... things that you will remember a life time, things that make you feel alive. These feelings, memories and experiences are not so common in a daily life. Days are passing by without even knowing it.
I am now travelling without a real goal and this too makes the journey feel in complete. I am thinking now to stop travelling for a while (a month or 2) and to study Spanish at an university.
A good job and carreer sounds nice but really sucks if you don't feel happy. Try to find something that makes you happy instead of leaving it like it is. Better to try somethings out than not to do anything about it. You can always find a job when things didn't turn out the way you wanted it.

9. Posted by Peter (Admin 5807 posts) 12y

Hey Tingo,

I think what you are experiencing is pretty normal out there.. I've felt this myself regularly. One tip I have heard particularly relating to keeping a job interesting (I think everyone gets bored with their job at some point) is to push yourself to learn new things. Nothing is worse than knowing everything you need to do the job and just letting the hours tick by. If you have any hobbies or interests, just pick up a book or do a search on the internet to find out more information and keep your mind active. Even if you have only a SLIGHT interest in something (whether it has anything to do with your job or not) it is worth finding more out about it. Whatever you do, try not to just watch television every evening - I reckon that's a sure road to depression!

Of course, I believe travelling is a great way to expand your experiences as well, but these are the things I do to make life at home a little more enjoyable - that's pretty much how this website came about for example

Peter

10. Posted by tingo (Full Member 94 posts) 12y

Hey all, thanks for the interesting replies!! I must say that I was really happy while travelling...but I realize that it is impossible to be travelling the whole time.. I mean travelling costs a lot of money, and you need to work to get the money ofcours...
One possibility would be to work during your travels, this would work well when you are still young. But I'm afraid that I won't have anything when I'm older if I live a life like that...
Probably it's a good idea to find more stuff to do after work... I was not having a fixed place since a long time, and while I was studying I didn't have a lot of time to do my hobbies. I will start painting and doing some sports again, the things I like before! And work to get the money to go again ;)