Rumour has it that Australia is sick of being ignored, and has decided to move to the vacant Atlantic area between the United states and Europe. This decision was taken after a drunken night out, during the move several smaller nation have been wiped off the face of the planet.
Tasmania was however, left behind. When asked to comment on this the Australian Prime Minister replied "well they have their Family and neighbours to keep them company", One in the same
Rumor has it the Australian move was conceived by Britain to give the Albanians and Romanians a land bridge to Canada after Jan. 1. The French quickly surrendered their title of "Land Bridge to the World".
Florida has launched a protest at the move, it seems that whilst Australia was moving (in the dark mind) they managed to sideswipe Florida and it now is residing 2 miles off the Mexican coast.
Rumour has it that there are 100,000 Mexicans swimming as we speak.
Rumor has it that Governor Jeb Bush of Florida has called his brother for assistance....the White House answering machine said: "Yo quiero Taco Bell.....please leaf a message."
Australia is accepting no responsibility, they are asking for Florida to provide proof that it was them who caused Florida to get shunted onto the Mexican shoreline. When asked for comment the Aussie Priminister replied "Look you blokes don't have one scrap of evedence that point to us, Australia is a preacefull country and anyone who says otherwise will get a kicking".
Though still not claiming responsibility for their miscalculated move, rumor has it that Australia has been the recipeint of a very large repair bill for the damage caused to the sunny state of Florida and for the cleaning of all the beach towels that will be used to dry the Mexican population which has finally reached land.
Rumor also has it that the Aussie Prime Minister was unable to see the evidence presented to him, proving their guilt, because he was too busy accepting dreadful bottles of wine and chunks of moldy cheese from the French. Seems Australia has been the dumping ground for these items for years, they just haven't realized it yet.
Rumours have it that Australia has just had a tip off (by a previous neighbour) regarding the dodgy wine France has been offloading onto the unsuspecting Aussies. The Aussie retaliation was to inform the Canadians, that France has been plotting to take over the country and rekindle some sort of empire.
Canada has taken this extremely hard, and voted to throw snow balls at the French, who seeing the first of the white balls, naturally dropped all weapons, waved the white flag and tried to flee in panic.
Rumour has it the French were actually Kiwis dressed in snowpants and mitts-tied-with-string. Upon seeing a half inch of snow, the Kiwis promptly pooped their pants. Luckily, the Kiwi army had budgeted for adult diapers and a 5-minute call to Mom.
The above was found to be a rumour, as everyone knows that alot of the Canadians are the poor leftovers from the French conquest of the provences.
The kiwi's did however try to repair the damage to Florida using duck-tape.
Rumor has it that a petite Montrealer has turned up in Surrey (somewhere in the Heart of Darkness, UK) in search of rogue Kiwis. Police have been notified that she is brandishing snowballs and a boombox filled with Celine Dion music. This threat should be considered credible, as Celine Dion can kill at 145 meters...