QUOTES ABOUT LAWYERS
"A Lawyer will do anything to win a case, sometimes he will even tell the truth."
"The one great principle of English law is to make business for itself."
"A man may as well open an oyster without a knife, as a lawyer's mouth without a fee."
"The only way you can beat the lawyers is to die with nothing."
"No brilliance is required in law, just common sense and relatively clean fingernails."
"Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish."
"An incompetent lawyer can delay a trial for months or years. A competent lawyer can delay one even longer."
"A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats."
'The only thing to survive a nuclear catastrophe are cockroaches and lawyers'
Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
Make crime pay. Become a Lawyer
I always loved..."Wear clean undies, incase you're in an accident."
Well...if a semi-truck is coming toward me while I am driving...I am pretty sure my undies won't be clean for long......
Never put anything smaller than your elbow in your ear. Now there's sound advice...
Haha! And "never eat anything bigger than your head."
CC should never pay attention to uninformed newbies!!! (Glad you changed your mind about posting!!!!!)
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they're cramming for their final exam.
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?"
She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.
Let a smile be your umbrella, and you'll end up with a face full of rain.
Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
Meow means "woof" in cat.
If you had bought $1000.00 worth of Nortel stock three year ago, it would now be worth $49.00.
With Enron, you would have $16.50 of the original $1,000.00.
With WorldCom, you would have less than $5.00 left.
If you had bought $1,000.00 worth of Budweiser (the beer, not the stock) one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the 10 cent deposit, you would have $214.00.
Based on the above, my current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle.