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A new job for Beerman?

Travel Forums Off Topic A new job for Beerman?

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121. Posted by Purdy (Travel Guru 3546 posts) 10y

WE NEED FURTHER ORDERS

The natives are restless - CC is going through detox for her chocolate addiction and her howls from that padded cell are driving us up the walls. James is clinging to that pole dancing pole and slobbering all over it. Jase has picked up 2 exotic dancers and brought them on board. Tway is STILL playing that Beatles album and refuses to put anything else on. Mikey hasnt climbed back up the flagpole and he and nurse hottie and playing doctors & nurses. Q was injured by a rabid CC when he tried to medicate her. Coco-Chloe is using those new hook hands of hers to steal the chocolate from CC's pile - there will be war when she comes out of the padded cell. Pardushopper - has run out of ink and has got very cantankerous.

We need direction, plus the boys broke my favourite whip and lm not happy.

122. Posted by Isadora (Travel Guru 13926 posts) 10y

I will be with you directly!! As I'm also in charge of Noah's Ark, I must see to feeding the zoo and cleaning out the stable deck. A Queen's work is never done!!!

123. Posted by Pardus (Respected Member 2356 posts) 10y

Muahahahaha.... Must have more ink... Wait, maybe I can use a substitute.. Yeah, hahahaha... There is a way, yesss.... I can continue my work for the benefit of the human race... Where did I put my knife, now?

124. Posted by beerman (Respected Member 1631 posts) 10y

....AND YOU PEOPLE CALL YOURSELF PIRATES?

Just weigh anchor, hoist the sails, and lets get under way already. Pardushopper, put down the knife.

SOUTH.....SOUTH, I SAY!!! THAR'S BOOTY APLENTY DOWN YONDER. ON TOWARD ST. LOUIS!!!!!!

Would Q.A Purdy be so kind as to bring cocktails to Captains Lounge, and whip Swabmate Jase for bringing the Tetley bitter aboard? The Captain has his own Lordly stash of beer.

125. Posted by Purdy (Travel Guru 3546 posts) 10y

Cocktails enroute your highness lve taken the liberty of decorating them with mini Jolly Roger Flags and umberellas.

I would whip Jase but he broke my whip and to be honest he enjoys it way too much - l will drink his Guinness though as punishment and pour the Tetley Bitter overboard!

126. Posted by abcdf (Full Member 557 posts) 10y

Ah crap! I cant destroy and pilage as you need two hands for the job. I need a side kick or something or other. I need a "Smee" or any relation to Johnny Depp would be fine. Better yet, can I bring aboard a dog or a little monkey to help me with my pilaging... and help me open doors.

Queenie, permission to bring aboard a pet to help me in my dailies. Oh and I would like to request a straw for my drinks.

127. Posted by Isadora (Travel Guru 13926 posts) 10y

I'm sorry I'm late!!!!!! Is there a martini for me???? Please!!!!! Do to the lack of able-bodied personnel, I had to clean the stable deck all by myself! I now need a shower and a martini!! I will be up in quarters with the King.

Quoting beerman

Just weigh anchor, hoist the sails, and lets get under way already. Pardushopper, put down the knife.
SOUTH.....SOUTH, I SAY!!! THAR'S BOOTY APLENTY DOWN YONDER. ON TOWARD ST. LOUIS!!!!!!

You heard the King - get on with it!!!

Oh, Pardushopper, the squid have been saving their ink for you. It should be enough for a couple of days or more if you don't make all those silly drawings too.

Purdy, a new whip has been authorized for you. See Nikki down in stores. (This one is very nice! Pearl-inlaid handle and made of the finest Indigo leather. Enjoy!)

128. Posted by Isadora (Travel Guru 13926 posts) 10y

Quoting coco-chloe

Ah crap! I cant destroy and pilage as you need two hands for the job. I need a side kick or something or other. I need a "Smee" or any relation to Johnny Depp would be fine. Better yet, can I bring aboard a dog or a little monkey to help me with my pilaging... and help me open doors.

Queenie, permission to bring aboard a pet to help me in my dailies. Oh and I would like to request a straw for my drinks.

Your choice, Coco - dog or monkey. I'd say go with the monkey but they aren't as loyal as a dog. Though, they are better at pillaging - just greedy. Hop on over to Noah's Ark and see which one you fancy. Orders will be left for Jase to make sure all of your drinks contain a straw. Let Purdy or me know immediately if he doesn't comply.

129. Posted by Isadora (Travel Guru 13926 posts) 10y

Quoting Q.

WHAT !?! What's this ? I go to tend some head wounds and Hottie Nurse Knightly has disappeared ? Oh, never mind, her suitures were all that neat. The witch doctor will find new Hottie nurse. Witch doctor awwaaayyy......

If her sutures were that neat, why are you dismissing her? (Hey, you're typo, not mine!) You'd better find a new nurse quickly as the Lucretia is setting sail immediately. Oh look, Nurse Knightly has returned! Aren't you in luck!!

130. Posted by Cupcake (Travel Guru 8468 posts) 10y

Quoting Purdy

Mikey hasnt climbed back up the flagpole and he and nurse hottie and playing doctors & nurses.

Oh really?
Mikey honey? I'd like to see you in my office for a minute....

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