HereICome makes a point.
"So, now you've been and had your big experience of the world... do you think youre ready to settle down and find a nice guy and have a family?"
It frustrates me that people think that if u dont follow the Average Joe (or Joeline) domestic path in life, then theres something wrong with you. And if u travel to exotic places, then maybe youre running away from something
I'm doing my first RTW trip (leave in 2 weeks) yey! BUT almost everyone over the age of 30 in my life add the comment,
"you never know, you might meet the man of your dreams, fall in love and marry and live out there" Does anyone else get that comment??? Now i feel like, if I don't come back with a man on my arm I'm a failure...I'm not travelling to find a man. I'm only 23. I'm travelling cos its something I've dreamed of since 12. Any tips on what I can bite back and say?!!!
Tell them to mind their own business and that it's your life, you will face the consequences of your decisions.
That's what I told my mum and it seemed to work and she's stopped nagging me about finding a boyfriend or an asian one anyway .
I think she accepted what I said.
My Mom is a big one on the "maybe you'll find a boyfriend" thing. My sister is getting the brunt of that these days - no matter how many times she tells my parents she's happy to be single again. STill, they'll whisper to me that she'll finally be truly happy when she finds "the one".
My parents don't give me too much grief about travelling, although I know they worry - especially if I go alone. It's my Grandmother and Uncle that drive me batty. Every time I leave alone, they worry that I don't have a man to take care of me should something happen. And my Grandmother needs constant reassurance that I will come home, and not settle somewhere far away (the pleas increase if I'm off to Belfast). It's only my Nan that encourages me, since she traveled so much herself. I think people who've never travelled see it as bigger and scarier that it actually is.
Mon and dad send me away (20 000km) to study i was 16 years old. Now they wonder why,at 18 years I got the bug and never stop, travelling and doing silly things around the world. Never telling them while am there doing it but saying everything with details (or nearly all of them ) when i come back.
Am 31 years old now, and yes they will prefer to see me married with kids running around. I think they managed to understand that it´s my life. I wont be happy if i had settled, I need the movement, i need the buzz of the new places. I need to challenge my mind with new things happening all the time.
Bying a house and driving the kids to school, and footy training it´s just not for me.
For the eating side of the travelling experience mum had understands since a very long time that SHE IS THE BEST COOK ON EARTH.
John: parents are parents, they want the best for us. For parents the best is what the society normally does. If you dont fit into it, parents worry. It´s as simple as that.
Lets face it, if we could have the dream partner who loves and adores us and us them, someone who wants exactly the same as us outta life, with no strings attached, no pressures to settle down and have a family, etc, this wouldnt be an issue! But few are so lucky.
If I have the choice of either settling for less and having the house and kids, OR going it alone and making the most of the single life- which is bloody good I must add, then its no contest. No need to "phone a friend" on that one!
Before I left for Sth America in April, lots of people suggested I may meet Mr Right over there and never return. Everyone wnated to know about any romances when i returned- oh the pressure!! How about asking about the culture? The experiences? The landscapes? The people? Get over it people!!!!!
I am a very happy person (with gratitude) and love my life. Friends and family wish us all to be gloriously happy in partnership but lets face it, how many really are? Yes, we are naturally drawn to have intimacy and love, but theres a pay off and some of us just arent willing to make the sacrifice. Some of us just dont dream the same.
wow, that makes me appreciate my dad. Both my brothers and i have the travel bug, we haven't had the family all together for about 6 years now.
Originally it was my brother on a WHV in the UK and Dad went crazy: "What do you mean you're not going to university?! Whats the point of travelling?! SEttle down and do some work and get a job!" But once he started sending back stories of all his great experiences, dad was a convert, so proud, couldn't get enough of it... then my other brother went, so when it finally came to my chance it was just a hug at the airport, saying 'have fun, send me photos..'
Now dad loves to hear all our travel plans. maybe because he's never been further than NZ and has commitments that leave him with little chance for travel, i think he's travelling vicariously through us...
I remember the first time I went travelling alone. When I said goodbye to my father, he said: "I wouldn't do it". There I was, having my plane ticket in my hand, backpack packed, ready to leave.
Later I was actually really thankful, that he only said this when I left and we both knew that there was no way, I would not leave. He could have given me a hard time in the weeks before my departure.
thanks again papi
My Mother was just fantastic.(my Father died when I was 8)
When I made my first big Trip on a ship (Freight and Passangers)
from Italy to Peru,she was very exited.
More exited whenn we saw each other by pur accident in the Streets of Barcelona.She was on a daytrip,sitting in a Bus,I was sitting on a Bench daydreaming.What a surprise.
We spent the Day togehter,I took her to the Ship,I got permit to show here the cabin where I slept and so on.
When she was pickt up by the Tourbus she told everybody that I will travel to Peru and stay there for a while.
After 4 Month living in Puno(of cource I was also in Cusco and Maccu Piccu)I had Chile in my mind,but not so much money left.
When my Mother got my Letter she managed to send me a Check that I would have enough money to this trip.She wrote me:Just because of money you should not miss Chile.My mother was not a rich women,but she was happy for me.I wrote her as much as possible,letters took weeks,sometimes the got lost.It was 1969 !!
She was in a home for old people when I prepared for the Antlantic crossing on a 33foot Sailyacht,from Canary Island to Tobago/Trinidad,here Eyes went big and wet,she opend here mouth and closed it,holding my hand very strong.When she had herself under control again she said: I wish you a safe trip,I wait for you.I was 23 days at sea till I could send a message.When I came home to Germany after 5 Month she could not get enough to hear about my adventures.To see my photos in Magazins was for her almost
She was 90 years old when I left Germany for good,to start a new life on a small Island,it was very hard for me to tell her.
She was looking at me,very intensiv and then she said,Marlis you are right.
If you think you have to do this,do it.Dont wait,and for sure dont wait because you feel guilty because of me.I had my life and I wish you the best.It was not easy for her since my Brother left for New Zealand 10 years earlyer.
She died 2 years later but not without knowing that I'was happy in my new life,that we both made the right desicions.
I have a tactict agreement with my folks. DADT. Don't Ask, Don't Tell. They know I travel allot, and that I end up in some destinations which aren't always the most visited or safest, but if they don't know, they don't mind. I'm always travelling anyway, haven't lived with them since I was young, or even in the same country for years, so they are used to me randomly appearing in strange places. But whilst I will sometimes tell them some stuff, I don't tell them if I am going somewhere even potentially dodgy beforehand, or often, whilst I am even there.
Much easier, and we're all happy.
Obviously though, that depends on the parents.
My parents, never ask where, why, what or how and I don't usually tell them anything that i thiink they don't need to know.
As for reports in the news about this happened or that happened there, I don't usually tell them where I am, just when i get back.