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worried mom

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1. Posted by Scollins (Budding Member 3 posts) 9y

My son and three of his friends are planning a road trip from NY to CA after graduation. Are there any websites out there that will put my mind at ease? They have an itinerary but it just seems too much too soon. I don't want to squash their fun but...

2. Posted by fuzzypuppy (Budding Member 62 posts) 9y

I'm not really aware of any such websites. You could look at this thread. It's from the perspective of the kid wanting to travel.

But in all honesty, maybe you should just talk to a counsellor. A qualified counsellor would be far more help than any website.

3. Posted by Herr Bert (Moderator 1384 posts) 9y

I don't know if there are any websites that can put your mind at easy. But if you tell us what your worries are we might come up, with some advise. Unless you want to implant a transmitter, there is no way that you can keep a minute-by-minute update on where he is. But I think that's not what you want.

The only advise that I can give you at this moment is, that he is not doing anything other guys at his age doesn't do. It's only natural that he wants to discover and explore the world. Make the deal that you call him every now and then, but don't do that every day. (I know it is tempting).

Making a trip like this will make him learn a lot about his country, and human relations. Be supportive and maybe make some recommondations about places, or things to do. That will make it easier for him to share his plans (and when he returns his experiences) with you.

Too soon? that's different for everybody else, I guess going out to explore the world is always better than stay home, and sit on the couch, or behind the computer.

4. Posted by Mel. (Travel Guru 4567 posts) 9y

Hello Scollins

How old is your son?
Over 18, I presume. If u want reassurance, ask him in a casual way, to be sure to email u often, with his travel news and stories.

I was 19, when I first moved to another country to live and work, and still 19, when I first backpacked, around Europe. I got in no danger or trouble. Unless your son is exceptionally stupid or irresponsible, trust him.


[ Edit: Edited on Mar 20, 2007, at 8:33 AM by Mel. ]

5. Posted by john7buck (Respected Member 458 posts) 9y

If they have a laptop, you could have him start a travel blog right here at Travellerspoint. That way, you'd be able to read about his adventures and follow their progress.

I'm sure he'll be fine. At some point, parents just have to let go and let their children experience life. Says someone with no kids, but who has certainly tested his own parents

6. Posted by james (Travel Guru 4136 posts) 9y

Go with him. You'll have a blast and make memories to enjoy for years to come.

7. Posted by bentivogli (Travel Guru 2398 posts) 9y

Quoting james

Go with him. You'll have a blast and make memories to enjoy for years to come.

I second that, but it strongly depends on your relationship with your kid whether he'll accept a 'chaperone'. If this is utterly unacceptable to him, what about meeting up half-way or towards the end, or getting them to change the itinerary so that there's 'family checkpoints' (aunts, friends of the family, etc.) in between?

You biggest concern I think should be his friends; are they a quiet responsible bunch between the four of them, or a group of boozing, hotheaded jocks with a strong tendency of getting themselves into fights or other kinds of trouble? In the latter case, you could try to make your son aware of your concerns, but whether this works again depends on your relationship with him...

One more thing concerning general safety threats. CA at present is one of the safest regions to travel; although I usually find them overly cautious anyway, there isn't a single official warning issued by the US state dept.

[ Edit: Edited on Mar 21, 2007, at 1:22 AM by bentivogli ]

8. Posted by fuzzypuppy (Budding Member 62 posts) 9y

Quoting james

Go with him. You'll have a blast and make memories to enjoy for years to come.

Oh yeah, I'm sure that's exactly what an 18 year old boy with his first taste of freedom wants: to have his overprotective mother with him.

9. Posted by Scollins (Budding Member 3 posts) 9y

I trust these boys pretty much completely. They've grown up together and they are honor students and involved in many things. I just worry about the things that might happen beyond their control. Things that kids of course don't think of...other drivers, getting into the wrong part of town, ect. How long should a trip like this take? They are thinking they will be back in 17 days.

10. Posted by john7buck (Respected Member 458 posts) 9y

With all do respect, I think you're being too over protective. But then again, most of the advice you'll get here is coming from people who at that same age left their home countries and traveled for upwards of a year in places like Southeast Asia, Africa, South America, etc. 17 days driving across America won't be the end of the world, though incidently, I would recommend much more time.

Also bear in mind that most of the traveling in between New York and California is pretty isolated and, well, boring.

I realize it can be a lot for you to soak in all at once. I can tell you that when I left on my first big trip alone (and all subsequent trips actually) thoughts have raced through my mind about all of the "bad things" could potentially happen. Without exception, I've come through unscathed and get home wondering what I had been so worried about.