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How Long?

Travel Forums General Talk How Long?

1. Posted by StaceyG (Inactive 250 posts) 8y

I went travelling for a year coming back last June and loved it - so I decided to go for my WHV for Canada and NZ leaving this June as I was hitting 30 this year and didnt want to miss out on the opportunity. Essentially this means I can have a year in Canada and then up to two years in NZ. Im excited to be going travelling again, but I do have close friends and family - none of whom want to see me away for such a long time and I dont know any way to resolve this and I know Im doing this for me and have to make my own decisions but im just feeling so guilty and mothers getting upset etc etc..and im working up to the whole goodbye bit again which is starting to freak me out. i know im fine once im acutally away somewhere and get settled into it and travel around and meet people but everyones saying 'oh you're so brave going on your own, for such a long time etc..' its starting to rub off on me! Any tips for getting over this?!?

2. Posted by Sander (Moderator 4810 posts) 8y

I suspect the only real way for getting "over" that is to step on the plane.
The three years will be over before you know it (I know that this was the case for me when I went on a two year trip). It's hard for non-longterm-travellers to understand the desire to go away for that long, though - and I don't think there's any words which can really alter their perception of this, so you're likely to keep getting those reactions from them. So, yeah... just *know* for yourself with quiet conviction that you're doing exactly what you want to be doing, and let the reactions you get back home slide off without affecting you. They're well-meant, but just lack the reference frame to understand.

You could also invite your mother to come visit you for a couple of weeks in New Zealand after a year. That should break up the "long" time period for her a bit, and allow her to see that you're doing just fine where you are. And hey, you survived the previous year away already, which should give her some confidence.

3. Posted by StaceyG (Inactive 250 posts) 8y

Thanks I really appreciate your comments there. You are right, especially when I think how long a year flew by - and even then I wasn't really ready to come home but it was 'expected' of me so I did it, and I want to have more freedom and flexibility this time to travel for as long as I wish. I definitely acknowledge the fact that the non-travellers of my home town do not understand and I will just have to counter-act this with chatting to my pals in others places who have been away or planning to, as this cheers me up! hence going on this website! thank u.

4. Posted by Buttfish (Respected Member 298 posts) 8y

my mom does it, too. actually, lots of other people are doing it, too. you've posed a good question. best i could think of was sticking in earphones and blasting some music and briskly walking away to work each day. that, and a crapload of determination to see it through. they do know how to pull at the heartstrings real well - but if you think about it, you would be doing the same thing (or feeling the same thing, anyway) if you were in their position. maybe have a sitdown and explain why you're going - give her your side, 100%. sometimes it's good for both sides to really understand each other. it'll give them a chance to understand why and how you're going for so long again, and it'll give you a chance to see why and how they're feeling about it...maybe even figure out a halfway point, like sander said - invite her over when you're settled, like.

good luck!