I have a "dear-dear-mum" problem.
you see, my deer deer mumsie is zorn (RIchard Adams anyone?) that is to say-terrifed that her one-and-only-baby girl is traveling to S.E. Asia for a few months. Its cruel. Her love for me is so terrible that its crushing me. I havn't even told her I've bought the plane tickets, and she asked me the other day how much I saved. I hadn't checked that week but was thinking in the way of a moderate amount, but then she was like "golly, you must have saved like 5 grand"...and well, i WOULD have that much, if i hadn't bought tickets though airtreks.com (GREAT EXPERIENCE SO FAR WITH THEM FOR RTW FARES). Fiji, New Zealand, Bangkok, Laos, Vietnam-Bam BAM BAM! A Mother's Worst NightMare...and I almost had to make her face it by blurting out a rather telling number.
- Phew* well, she's getting the idea that I'm set on this...vaccinations coming next week, buying equipment, etc...and hey...I'M NOT MAKING EXCUSES! She's a SMART lady, worked for the united nations, so she's ALL familar with the sex trade in thailand, and the communist regiems that run Laos. She fires one at me like people get kidnapped all the time...and I fire back 'well ! Also in the uS! LIke hundreds of thousands per year! BOO ya! ...
anD i WON'T be alone right? guys? I mean, gals? ugh! In trying to assuage me mum's fears I'm posting around the Interblog for some "companions"-whatever that means-to meet along the way. But I have faith that once on San Khao Rd in Bangkok I'll find rheems and dreams of people in the same story I'm in. Is it naive to think that I'll find companionship along the way? I just imagine that I'll meet people going the same way, share bus rides and dorm rooms. Sharing shade and chocolate bars (oh how can i enjoy chocolate in such HOT countries-no good for bus travel)...anyhow, people are people everywhere and humans survive and adapt, which is what travellers are...
if you're a traveller your always keeping elements of your survival close at hand. You never take for granted a warm bed, and thank the earth sometimes for its lingering heat. I think I'm fit to survive if I keep my wits about me, and I'm quite sure I'm not the only gal to do so, but damn, if i could at LEAST have some reassurance (and some for my dear mumsie too--!) that I'll find company, tour groups, buddys, pals, friends, familar faces along the backpacker routes, travelling patners, dormies, etc etc. If you hear me, advise me.
PLease see my forum under "Companions"
and I'm known as -snip-, if you wish to visit me there.
THanks to travellerspoint for empowering people, helping us to be more mobile and safe! Greatness!
Out! Rev. Croftee
[ Edit: Sorry, no personal details please. ]
I have a similar problem with my mum. I'm 29 and have been backpacking since I was 18. Every time I go somewhere (whether it is to visit my grandma 1 hour by train away or to Russia or the Middle East for my yearly backpacking trip) she gets these ridiculous panic attacks about all the bad things that are going to happen to me.
If your mom gets the idea that you are set on it you are halfway through.
I must admit that over the years I've grown quite coldhearted. When I went to Iran and Turkey in 2006 (just imagine the scene that unfolded when I said "Iran") I just said:
I've bought and paid for the flight tickets and made reservations for the hostels. I've arranged for transport to and from the airport as well as bought international health insurance. I've done my homework and Iran is a very safe country for travelling in as a single woman. I'm 27 and there is nothing you can do to stop me from going. DEAL WITH IT!
And to my grandmother:
Please accept that while I love you all to pieces and that while you will always see me as a your little baby I am a grown-up woman now and after 4 years of Middle Eastern studies I know what I am getting myself into when I go to Iran.
That was the end of the discussion on that subject.
The killer was probably not that I was going away (though that played a big factor), but that my mom had once again had to face the fact that I am not a child anymore. She is happiest when she has all her 3 children with her and accounted for. I've long ago accepted that (although it is annoying) because there are worse fates out there than being loved too much. And I guess she has learned to accept that I'll just pack up my stuff and go whenever and whereever I can...
[ Edit: Edited on Jun 5, 2008, at 5:18 AM by t_maia ]
I have the same problem with my mother as well. I'm planning on going to Thailand and my mom is freaking out that I'm going to be kidnapped and killed. She basically thinks I'm going to die. I get the whole "it's not that I don't trust you, I just don't trust other people."
Yes, you will be meeting people. I don't think that's naive to say. I've met people in most hostels I stay at, and have found groups to travel with to my next location, etc. It's pretty common. I think that if you're open to meeting people in the road, you will probably meet people. Most people are looking for the same thing. Otherwise, it would be mighty lonely.
But I doubt any of that will calm your mother down. So I think you'll just have to reassure her that you'll send her e-mails as much as you can. My first trip alone I had to promise I'd e-mail my mother everyday. And this was in Western Europe. Now I too will be heading to Thailand, and really, they'll just have to deal with it. Mothers will always worry, it's part of the job description.
Bangkok or Thailand itself, is one of the safest place to travel to as a single woman. Lots of scams on the Khaosan Road so just be careful by either ignoring them or reply politely no firm and everything is going to be alright. I travel alone yearly to Bangkok. So there really isn't anything to be worried about! The city itself is majority visited by millions of visitors. As well the road to Cambodia, Vietnam and Thailand. Really nothing to be worried about. But of course as a single girl. Just have to be well informed about transportation and your way around. Also you can check the website talesofasia.com with good advices for backpack travellers to SE Asia. Or check the Thai Authority Tourism office website. There you can find every tip of information, room rates, what to see and do. Transportation and travel agency; almost everything single information you will be needing. Show your mom a bit of the picture crowded by tourist to assured her. Maybe that will make her feel a bit less worried. I hope this will help. Have a good trip.
This is very funny...
people die in their sleep more often than ladies being kidnapped in Khaosan road.
The only danger I encountered in 14 months is in BUKID BINTANG, KL, MALAYSIA.
that is the khaosan road of KL, BUT ITS ULTRA POSH AND CLEAN and modern... 1st world!
Then you have an Indian guy chasing you, shamelessly trying to rob in the light of street lamps and bars.
He even gave death threats to my female friend and boy, we look like Malays, well technically, we are from the same race.
That was shocking... Malaysia, definitely the safest in SOUTH EAST ASIA, and then you get that trauma.
Point is shit happens anywhere.
Parents and families are pretty weird.
In my case, it's not my Mum, it's my Dad as well as my Brother. I'm in London at the moment so it's not exactly third world, but they're still worried about me, asking when I'll be going home (for good), urging me to go home (for good) and I've only been here for two weeks!
The economy worries them, me being a single female worries them, me not having a job worries them. Everything worries them. I've wanted to come to the UK for over 5 years. I've worked on my parents to reassure them for the last 3. I've always threatened to go, they've never believed it. But here I am, doing my own thing.
I love them for worrying about me, but I need to do my own thing. This is exciting and scary at the same time but I am enjoying it.
Everyone tells me I'm pretty strong and independent for leaving everything and moving to a different country on my own. I suppose I am, but I'm just following my dreams.
I'm glad there are others out there that have the same sort of parents and deal with the same things that I deal with. It's nice having that closeness with your family and I say we are pretty lucky.