As the question implies, do you worry incessantly about things that may or may not happen?
Of late, I think I'm falling into this terrible mind-trap that good times must be 'earned' and worrying is way of being responsible...yikes!
Have you ever been worried sick about everything and anything under the sun? I mean, you could be in the perfect holiday destination but suddenly this awful thought that you had forgotten to lock the front door creeps in on you...do you dismiss it or continue hallucinating for as long as your holiday lasts?
I've read that worrying to some people, is a way of being 'prepared' and not wanting to be surprised by the outcome (it sort of applies to me, I guess). How do you deal with this condition?
I am a total worrier, and I think I do see it as a way of being prepared, as you suggest. I also think it stems from my father's attitude that pessmists are never disappointed! (I know pessimism isn't the same as worrying but I think they both stem from a similar negative thought process.) In a way I can understand this, because if the thing that you have been worrying about doesn't happen then you are pleasantly surprised. But I also cause undue stress to myself by worrying about things that end up not happening. I also think I have a wild imagination, which causes me to think up all kinds of unlikely scenarios. I'm not sure if i have a way of dealing with being a worrier really. my boyfriend is the opposite and doesn't worry about anything, so it helps to have him around!
Take life the way it comes. There is no added value in being worried.
I am a total worrier, and I think I do see it as a way of being prepared, as you suggest. I also think it stems from my father's attitude that pessmists are never disappointed!
Oh my goodness! You're my long-lost twin!
My Dad claims to never get excited about anything in case it doesn't work out--that way, he wont be disappointed. I remember him being a phenomenal worrier when we were kids; he's worry about the grass being overwatered (we used to come home from school and have to put a hose from the lawn to the sewer to drain the yard--and suck the thing to get it started!), being on time (we were always a half hour early for everything), work, chores, you name it. He's also a really good natured person,so it balanced out. But yeesh!
So I've gone and inherited the worry gene. I mostly worry about potential pitfalls--stuff that's unknown. What if, what if, what if.. it's a total waste of time and I know it, but it's stronger than me most of the time. I'm reading Eat, Love, Pray and I'm realizing I'm not too good at just sitting back and doing nothing. It's only when I'm travelling that I can really unplug and unwind completely. Whenever we go to Belfast to see Neal's family, I just sit back and go with the flow. The most relaxed I've ever been is in Belfast! Can't wait to go back in May...
Not that l would call myself a worrier but l used to be anally organised for everything - every second of every day needed an itinerary and a plan (with a backup just to be sure), BUT l am an optimist and thing that there has to be good to come out of every situation no matter how terrible it may immediately seem (ie when my dad was on deaths door last year it was a bad time but what did come out of it that as a family unit my sisters and folks and l are now a hell of a lot closer because of it).
Over the last 12 months my life has had some incredible changes and what it has taught me is not everything can be planned so why bother? Go with the flow and see what interesting path you will float down!
Im off on holiday tomorrow and nothing is planned (well by me anyhow) bar the flight and some accomodation the rest can just evolve l'm happy that the temps are gonna be high and the sun will shine!
BUT l can counteract this l guess with the fact that lm already worrying in that my boyfriend's job is taking him to Afghanstan in March for 6 months and well that has many many connotations of its own but they are already running rampant through my head already although l am trying to ignore them.
Of course not. What a silly thing to suggest.
Worry is just counter-productive. The actual act of worrying resolves nothing, gets you nowhere, wastes time and stresses you out.
But we all do it sometimes It's only human. Some people are naturally more prone to it than others, they just can't help it. Maybe if you can make peace with the fact that you are a worrier, you'll stop worrying about it
It mightn't be your thing, but meditation really can help (and I dont mean hours of contemplative silence or anything, just a few mins or so during the day where you sit quietly, try to centre yourself and practice banishing the worrying thoughts from your mind). It's difficult at first, but if you pratice you will improve, and before long you have a sort of control over random crazy thoughts. Maybe, if you try it you might be able to reconditon yourself not to worry so much.
I went on a Buddhism/meditation course in Manchester a year or so ago, and it's definitely really good for stress, anxiety and loads of other aspects of your life. I must admit I haven't done it for a while but I always mean to start practicing it again.
I think it was Van Wilder who said "Worrying is like a rocking chair. Sure it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere."