So you have exchanged emails in a bar. At that time you were tipsy and cool. You seem to have made the connection, you facebooked him/her the next day.
But then when you are travelling in the city where that person is based you, then you feel its ackward to make that phone call. I have a list of numbers, but somehow I cant load my phone, so no one call me. I assume it happens to people. We just dont think its worth our time...
I regret some meetings with people I have exchanged emails with. If they are locals, God, they have no idea how travellers think... they waste too much time and they PRACTICALLY useless. They try to help you too much and I know I could have done better blind folded.
And sometimes, you were so cool then. But things are different when he/she is not on a holiday? I mean you are with a backpack, he is working in his city.
I also feel guilty not calling. I am thinking, am I feeling insecure. So I feel oblige to call. And I call someone and not the others, I also feel guilty of playing favorites. Like I will call the White guy and none of the local Asians.
I keep exchanging emails in bars and I think its stupid if I dont ever use them. I am also very INDEPENDENT, the locals would be too hospitable (I assume), westerners tend to go dutch and I like that.
I am in a city with so many aquaintances... But I am not sure if it would ruin my short holiday, if I choose to be sentimental. I like my friends, BUT I AM more interested in meeting new people and preferably travellers too.
Hi. I just give people my email address. I have several and the one I give them is the one I use for strangers I meet while in another country. If they dont reply then fine. If they do then I may take it further. I find that over 90% of the people I exchange emails with fizzle out after a few messages. It rarely goes much further.
This is a risk - the people you stay in touch with might be too hospitable or too helpful when you meet them, and that might ruin your plans for general global misanthropy (although I somewhat doubt it). Might I suggest avoiding this by spitting directly in the eye of anyone who comes within two metres of you? That will avoid the potential dilemma over whether or not to take a phone number.
To call or not to call? Sometimes you want to be nostalgic, or you just don't want to think that you are insecure about yourself. They know I'm in town. But my phone is off. I will be traveling to other cities and I also have a list of numbers and emails.
What would you do? Lets say, you met someone in a bar and at that time you just bonded in that 4 hours of drinking. And you exchanged numbers, you somehow went beyond the barriers of race, gender, culture and economics and you dont want it to be just an encounter, so you vowed to meet again. But then reality sets in, you probably dont have much in common. Its a bit uncomfortable to phone in someone, who is not in a travel mode, plus the diverse ethnic background, the language barrier, and other stuff.
Still we keep exchanging phones and emails. Lately, I feel very ackward recieving cards from people I dont really like. In some occassion, I manage to say no. I mean I said my email and especially my elitistic and seemingly racist facebook is personnal. It felt empowering.
My German roomate just left and we were cool together. But I skipped the exchange email part. Its just a bit uncool lately or queer, if the guy is hot and you met you only met for a day and you are acting like brothers.
I always find that I have a really hard time keeping in contact with people people I meet abroad; besides the initial mutual connection there just isn't really anything more to talk about. Just the way it goes I guess.
I just emailed everyone I met in my 1st hostel experience and that was 2 years ago. Amazing they remember me and they were meeting the other people they met there this month.
I spent 6 days in the same hostel and met ZERO people, tragic. Not one email... Nobody was interesting, except for this French guy, but he way too cool to ask for emails. My perky German roomate and I was too cool to ask for emails. Everyone else was not worth a greeting. I don't think I have changed, its just that nobody was interesting and I dont have the energy to fake it.
I am in another city and I just told someone I met in Bangkok that I am in town, but I am not meeting him, coz I am here for a day. I guess indirectly implying, that if he asked me to sleep in his couch, id be around for a week.
here's how I do it.
If I only met someone in a bar or a club or a hostel for a few hours I'll normally get a number and try to do something with them within the next few days, while we are in the same city or town. maybe go to a site or go camping/hiking, go out for a few drinks, a movie...whatever. After that time...it's over, let's be honest, we live in different corners of the world.
There are other people I would probably just call up and meet for drinks if it was convenient for everybody involved. Maybe they are already going out and I could meet them there. That way there really is no pressure on anyone.
then there are the people I met and really bonded with and traveled with for weeks or months at a time. I still keep in touch with those people, I've visited two already and will visit at least two more in my life time... these are the people I have a lot in common with also. They are good friends! There are a few people in Ireland, England, Israel that I can call and just have a normal conversation with, when I'm not travelling.
I did made 3 phone, and somehow, I am happy it failed to connect me. They changed numbers, while the other person had no credits in his phone.
I had no so great moments with people I met again, after I kept my promise to this line, "Call me anytime you ever get to my city." IT WAS JUST SO aukward (however you spell this word). Hell to be precise. I was in his apartment and the talk almost felt like we Anthropologist discussing culture and stuff, that you don't talk when you are both drunk in some raggae bar miles away from reality. And yet, I have not learned my lesson. I still try calling, even with the hesitation. You've had such experience? I mean people are different in their apartments or homes, than how they were on a beach or club. What was I thinking.
But I do regret loosing the email address of this cool Swedish grad student, who knows how to party. I probably subconciously, got rid of that card.