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Travel Forums Off Topic You may find a few new ones in here....

1. Posted by Airfix (Full Member 99 posts) 11y

-snip-

Q: What's the difference between a woman from Wigan and a walrus?
A: One's got a moustache and smells of fish and the other lives in the sea.

Q: How many social workers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, but it takes 15 to write a paper entitled "coping with darkness"

Q: What have the Gas Board and pelicans got in common?
A: They can both stick their bills up their arse

Q: Why don't blind people skydive?
A: It scares the shit out of the dog.

Q: Why was the washing machine laughing?
A: Because it was taking the piss out of the undies

Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dog

Q: What does Joan Collins put behind her ears to attract men?
A: Her feet

Q: What do you call a pig with three eyes?
A: Piiig

Q: How do you make a dog drink?
A: Put it in a liquidizer

Q: How many pessimists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, it's probably screwed in too tight anyway

Q: What's pink and hard?
A: A pig with a flick knife.

Q: What's got 500 legs and no pubic hair?
A: The front row at a Busted concert.

Q: What's got four legs and an arm?
A: A rottweiler

Q: What do you call bears with no ears?
A: B

Q: What's got two legs and bleeds?
A: Half a dog

Q: What's the difference between bogies and brussel sprouts?
A: Kids won't eat brussel sprouts

[ Edit: sorry, although funny, these are a little too rude.. ]

2. Posted by lil j (Travel Guru 1303 posts) 11y

ok airfix do you have a book in front of you when you enter in a post!?!!!

3. Posted by Kathi20 (Respected Member 270 posts) 11y

I guess so...

Kathi

4. Posted by Hien (Moderator 3906 posts) 11y

LOL!

Peter, I think you should change your rating system,
or at least include levels like PG, 16, 18, R, ...

Cheers,
Hien

5. Posted by Peter (Admin 5789 posts) 11y

Sorry Airfix, but I've had to edit that post fairly brutally. We try to at least pretend to be wholesome around here ;)

From the forum rules:

1. NO swearing, derogatory or inflammatory remarks are allowed.

Peter

6. Posted by Airfix (Full Member 99 posts) 11y

OOPS!!! Sorry!!

7. Posted by Peter (Admin 5789 posts) 11y

No biggie :) I had a good laugh anyway.. the thought of half a dog dripping with blood kind of appealed to me in a sick way !

Peter