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your thoughts...especially if you moved to be with someone

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11. Posted by sunset1999 (Full Member 108 posts) 6y

So? What happened?? Did you call her and talk to her? Are you moving? This is a really good story. Tell me more!

12. Posted by Herr Bert (Moderator 1384 posts) 6y

Quoting Cool Paul

on one hand I'm turning 29 and I need to think about my future. On the other hand...I'm turning 29 and I need to think about my future.

Why? What's so important about the future, that you have to think about it, when you are just 29. The future will always be there. Also when you are 34 like me (moved 2 years ago to Spain), or 61 like VegasMike. Start living in the now, not in the future. (there is always tomorrow)

Jobs are to be find anywhere if one is willing to work. If you have a job in Ireland, it will look even better on your CV. My two cents: Do it if you have the possibility. You don't know what the future will bring, so enjoy the present.

13. Posted by Cool Paul (Travel Guru 611 posts) 6y

Quoting Herr Bert

Quoting Cool Paul

on one hand I'm turning 29 and I need to think about my future. On the other hand...I'm turning 29 and I need to think about my future.

Why? What's so important about the future, that you have to think about it, when you are just 29. The future will always be there. Also when you are 34 like me (moved 2 years ago to Spain), or 61 like VegasMike. Start living in the now, not in the future. (there is always tomorrow)

Jobs are to be find anywhere if one is willing to work. If you have a job in Ireland, it will look even better on your CV. My two cents: Do it if you have the possibility. You don't know what the future will bring, so enjoy the present.

Well I've addressed the work situation in my original post as did a few others so that's that I understand that part of the situation better than anyone.

but when you talk about the future like that you have to think about things that can go wrong.

8 years ago when my brother was 32 He had no job and no health insurance. just had a kid and was raising her, staying at home everyday....then he was diagnosed with cancer. thank god he's alive and made it through, but he'll be deep in debt for the rest of his life, guaranteed.

sure I can't live in fear but the fact is I'm in a good situation right now and I have to be grateful for it. Things can come up and I would like to be prepared financially.

I'm glad things worked out for you and a few others but you know things don't always work out. I mean hell I moved to NZ thinking I would find a job and live there, but no one wanted to give me an interview.

I don't know. so as far as updates go...I've talked to her but I have not mentioned anything. I just want to think about it some more and see how things progress over here. Maybe I'll hate this new job and need to get away. Maybe my 4 weeks of paid vacation time will fill my traveling needs.

so now the way I see it, I can go to ireland and risk losing everything for a girl, or I can stay here and with my new job, I can give the east coast a really good second chance.

14. Posted by Q' (Travel Guru 1987 posts) 6y

Well look, if the two of you become a couple, trust me, it won't be the last time you have long talks about moving, jobs and what to do in life. The fundamental thing you have to understand is that a relationship doesn't include just you. Whatever you decide in terms of your physical location, the one thing that's probably going to do more for your relationship or future relationship is to have this honest heart to heart talk with this girl. And if you don't want to or feel comfortable with talking to her, honestly, you just might want to ask some deep questions about your "feelings" for this girl if you know what I mean. It's a tough one. But if you look at it in the right way, and do the right things the rewards are there too.

[ Edit: Edited on 22-Jul-2010, at 21:52 by Q' ]

15. Posted by sunset1999 (Full Member 108 posts) 6y

I totally agree with Q'.

If you don't open up and start the conversation of... "[insert name]... I think I'm [falling for/in love with] you... ". She will either go into shock and some awkwardness... meaning that she doesn't reciprocate the feelings... or she will say that she is also falling for you.

You should take a deep breath and do it because at least you will know before you change your life or she changes her life. She could be willing to move to the US even though it seems like she's happy to be home. But if you talk about it and if feelings are mutual then at least you'll have someone to plan things and to discuss things with.

It takes someone brave to start things off. But at least you'll have no regrets in the end.

16. Posted by SassyKitty (Budding Member 46 posts) 6y

At this point, I don't know if I would go to be with her as the communication hasn't been that heavy. As for going to Ireland though, I would say jump at the chance! I'm planning on heading that way in a year myself, and I'm so glad Americans can finally get work visas for somewhere. As for the gap in your resume, I wouldn't worry, you'd have employment there. And employment overseas is always great for a resume.

17. Posted by lily89 (Budding Member 50 posts) 6y

i think from you have been saying you need to ask her the 'questions' to see if you can make it a relationship so your not in limbo, it would be better to know her situation than just going nuts wondering. if she does want the same as you (we all hope this) could she not come over to live with you maybe?

Ireland is not a bad place to work with as like all jobs they will want highly skilled workers to help the economy and see look into what big companies are there and send off a few applications.

18. Posted by beavis (Budding Member 177 posts) 6y

I dont know how people think there is work in Ireland at the moment. There is a massive percentage of unemployment here at the moment. its expected that 200,000 people will leave Ireland by the end of 2011.

19. Posted by Cool Paul (Travel Guru 611 posts) 6y

yeah at the moment I'm leaning towards staying put and just letting it go.

there are a lot of things to think about with this. thanks for your input everybody.

20. Posted by beavis (Budding Member 177 posts) 6y

Seems to me like you gave up without really trying.

Then again, if it was meant to be then it would have happened.