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Are You a Perfectionist?

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31. Posted by areinstein (Travel Guru 2788 posts) 11y

Quoting tway

I can walk in and literally trace his steps. When I cam home late Friday night I found: boots all over the hall, door unlocked, bag open on the floor and contents spilling out, clothes in a line to the bed, blankets in a knot, water on the floor in the bathroom, toothpaste in a glob in the sink, towels stuffed into the rack, medicine cabinet open, shower curtain open, light on in kitchen... and him smiling at me when I turned the corner. That's when I remind myself that the latter is so very worth all the former.

But sometimes I have to remind myself twice.

You must have the patience of a saint...but havent you noticed that as we get older we are less willing to put up with things we dont like or agree with? I think there is a stage in your life when you say..."I just dont have to deal with this...". I do like your attitude though, the smile around the corner. That is very sweet. But there is still hope, you may still be on time to retrain him, some people may disagree with me but men can be molded and trained to do what you want them to do. I have given the 12 step course to a couple of friends and it has worked!

32. Posted by Isadora (Travel Guru 13926 posts) 11y

Quoting areinstein

[quote=tway]
.but havent you noticed that as we get older we are less willing to put up with things we dont like or agree with?

Speak for yourself, lady!!! The older I have gotten, the more willing to just let things go. It isn't worth the effort and, the older I get, I really don't care. I am finding that I disagree more but just don't have the energy to go against the grain in a general sense. At home, I have absolutley nothing I can complain about. I am not saying this for "bragging rights" by any means, but Mr. Isa is truly the perfect husband. We both accept each other's eccentricities and habits and all that other stuff because it is what makes us... well, us. There are no fights, no fuss, no friction and who cares if the bathroom towel is on the floor? There is a limit to the sloppiness, but from Tway's description - the man is worth the effort.

Mr Isa says: his (Tway's b/f) sloppiness is beyond the acceptable limit but he will probably clean up after himself if asked (not told). If not, elctroshock therapy is always effective as a training device.

33. Posted by daveh (Travel Guru 1027 posts) 11y

Quoting areinstein

But there is still hope, you may still be on time to retrain him, some people may disagree with me but men can be molded and trained to do what you want them to do. I have given the 12 step course to a couple of friends and it has worked!

Oooh, you'll bruise a few male egos with that one. So you fall in love with a guy, then mold and train him into what you want him to be. Before you know it you're bored because the guy you fell in love with has been turned into a wet blanket

34. Posted by Isadora (Travel Guru 13926 posts) 11y

Touche, Dave!!!!!

Relationships are give and take - not by one person but by both. And besides,
when you try your hand at molding, you rarely wind up with anything more than Silly Putty. Now that makes for an interesting relationship...

35. Posted by areinstein (Travel Guru 2788 posts) 11y

Alright alright guys...lets not misinterprete my above statements please hahaha. What I meant what I said "as we get older", that is exactly what Isa said. You dont want to waste your time anymore because you already know it will be wasted effort. Hence, you just dont bother and walk away so I think we are on the same page there Isa.
Come on Dave, egos hurt? I am just talking about the bad habits now. There are still 1000 things I cant change about my husband and I just want to kill him sometimes but I still love him. I mean, it has been 12 yrs already. If I had a puppet as a husband I would have left a very looooong time ago.

36. Posted by areinstein (Travel Guru 2788 posts) 11y

Quoting isadora

I have absolutley nothing I can complain about. I am not saying this for "bragging rights" by any means, but Mr. Isa is truly the perfect husband.

Ahem Isa, then we are both very lucky...I too have the perfect husband, although I am not sure he would call me the perfect wife I am going to have to ask him. The kitchen and I have never gotten along...I mean, is it possible to burn boiling pasta?

37. Posted by Isadora (Travel Guru 13926 posts) 11y

Quoting areinstein

Ahem Isa, then we are both very lucky...I too have the perfect husband, although I am not sure he would call me the perfect wife I am going to have to ask him. The kitchen and I have never gotten along...I mean, is it possible to burn boiling pasta?

I believe you are right Anne, we're on the same page - just got there from different word directions. And, I did not mean to imply that I had the only "perfect" one out there. If I recall correctly, from another thread somewhere, Joz also has the perfect thing going. Are the 3 of us channeling some strange voodoo woman or marraige shaman or something??? Perfection is truly just a perception anyway.

Yes, it's possible to burn boiling pasta!! I forgot to put coffee in the coffee-maker yesterday so there was a big pot of hot water ready this morning! Some days the magic works, others - it's on vacation!

38. Posted by tway (Travel Guru 7273 posts) 11y

Quoting isadora

Mr Isa says: his (Tway's b/f) sloppiness is beyond the acceptable limit but he will probably clean up after himself if asked (not told). If not, elctroshock therapy is always effective as a training device.

He really, really does try. I have to give him that. But it's somehow just not in him. I asked him if he could just make the bed when he leaves after me, and he never fails to put every, single thing on backwards or upside down - sheets hanging to the floor and bedspread on the completely wrong way. It looks awful - but I know he was thinking "It'll make her happy if I make the bed". So how can I stay mad?

And I agree with Dave, although he was being a little cheeky, I'm sure. ;) We women do tend to mold and prod and nag and complain and ask and pout and then we wonder why our men now flinch when we start a sentence with "You know..." and we can't figure out why our once proud, spontaneous, carefree boys are suddenly looking a little milquetoast... But at least the bed is made properly! ;)

39. Posted by areinstein (Travel Guru 2788 posts) 11y

Quoting isadora

Yes, it's possible to burn boiling pasta!! I forgot to put coffee in the coffee-maker yesterday so there was a big pot of hot water ready this morning! Some days the magic works, others - it's on vacation!

Phheww, I am glad I am not the only burning things in the kitchen...

40. Posted by areinstein (Travel Guru 2788 posts) 11y

Quoting areinstein

Quoting isadora

Yes, it's possible to burn boiling pasta!! I forgot to put coffee in the coffee-maker yesterday so there was a big pot of hot water ready this morning! Some days the magic works, others - it's on vacation!

Phheww, I am glad I am not the only burning things in the kitchen...

Edit button anyone..."only one burning..."