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Yelling During A Disagreement

Travel Forums Off Topic Yelling During A Disagreement

1. Posted by Wocca (Inactive 3745 posts) 11y

If your partner started yelling at you during a disagreement, how would you respond?

2. Posted by areinstein (Travel Guru 2788 posts) 11y

Wow, thats a tough one to answer...when I was younger I would yell right back just as loud if not louder regardless of who was right or wrong.

Now, sometimes I fight back, it really depends on the issue at hand but if I know I am 100% right, which 99.5% of the time I am , then I would definitely attempt to have the last word.

But most of all, I dont think anyone likes to be yelled at period. Whether right or wrong, it is not proper especially if in public. Treat people like you like to be treated...heard that somewhere

3. Posted by samsara_ (Travel Guru 5353 posts) 11y

It would be great if you could have an argument without yelling/getting yelled at but it just doesnt happen. It's so unproductive because the other person's back is up straight away and things never get sorted out. No-one likes to be yelled at.

I'm a pretty docile creature until someone yells at me. And then it's Mount Etna! Complete HOT HEAD!!!! I flare and the fireworks begin.

But I'm a firm believer in this:

If someone needs to explode about something, getting yelled at temporarily is better than being subjected to the silent moody treatment for a week.

Moody people are cowards.

4. Posted by tway (Travel Guru 7273 posts) 11y

There's nothing more passively aggressive than someone who always stays calm in an argument and insists everyone else should be calm. Talk about control issues! Sometimes you need to blow up, to save yourself from self-combustion.

5. Posted by areinstein (Travel Guru 2788 posts) 11y

Quoting tway

There's nothing more passively aggressive than someone who always stays calm in an argument and insists everyone else should be calm. Talk about control issues! Sometimes you need to blow up, to save yourself from self-combustion.

Hahaha, my husband used to do that to me all the time back in the day when I had the HOT LATIN TEMPER every second of the day. I would yell and scream and he wouldnt say a word and then all calm and collected he would say...and why is it that you are screaming, lets calm down for a second. AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHH, thats when I would really explode like the irish in Eve...

We've learned to control that now...er...I've learn. I dont yell anymore or argue over silly things but I still get mad at him sometimes. The temper is always there but it is just under control right now. ;)

6. Posted by samsara_ (Travel Guru 5353 posts) 11y

The thing is you cant have two hot heads in a relationship because it will burn out very quickly.

I went out with a guy once and we had a pretty intense relationship. That intensity, while initally very attractive, ended up having far more downsides to it. Everyone used to comment on how much we argued (at the time i didnt want to admit it) but when things were good, they were very very good. I always thought the relationship would sustain itself on the good times, but of course it didnt. It burned out very brightly but very quickly.

So, like Anne's husband, maybe you need someone to balance you out. ;)

7. Posted by areinstein (Travel Guru 2788 posts) 11y

Quoting samsara2

The thing is you cant have two hot heads in a relationship because it will burn out very quickly.

I went out with a guy once and we had a pretty intense relationship. That intensity, while initally very attractive, ended up having far more downsides to it. Everyone used to comment on how much we argued (at the time i didnt want to admit it) but when things were good, they were very very good. I always thought the relationship would sustain itself on the good times, but of course it didnt. It burned out very brightly but very quickly.

So, like Anne's husband, maybe you need someone to balance you out. ;)

God Eve, you sound like me...when things were good, they were very very good...but when things got hot, watch out! I was too in an intense relationship once always searching for excuses to stay together. You do need someone to balance you out...I call Steve my balance, my Ying Yang, my equilibrium...it has worked out very nicely

8. Posted by Isadora (Travel Guru 13926 posts) 11y

Depends on who is yelling at me.

Some one I love or care about - usually makes me start to cry and I shut up or try t fix it.

A stranger or acquaintance - I walk away. I have have been known to yell back, but those times are rare. It's wasted energy on someone with whom I do not have close ties.

9. Posted by Cupcake (Travel Guru 8468 posts) 11y

Quoting Wocca

If your partner started yelling at you during a disagreement, how would you respond?

After they removed my shoe from their mouth..I would be finished yelling...;)