do i go or not...

Travel Forums Australia / New Zealand & The Pacific do i go or not...

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11. Posted by sunset07 (Budding Member 4 posts) 12y Star this if you like it!

You only need to look at all the responses you've had!

You would meet so many people out there. You should defo do it. Plus ill be there then!

He prob thinks your not that serious about it?

There are loads of people out there in the same situation. Do it for yourself!

12. Posted by floflo (Budding Member 3 posts) 12y Star this if you like it!

yeh your right, he thinks its jus pie in the sky n will probably never happen...
its jus actually getting around to saying, right this is it im going! It'll be soooo hard, i dont kno if it would be better to break it off now or later....??? god, why is nothing simple! haha. I dont think i could break up now, it feels like next yr is to far away at the mo as im sitting at wrk staring at my laptop if u kno what i mean?!
There is not a doubt in my mind about going or not tho!! It has to be done!

13. Posted by Sander (Moderator 5296 posts) 12y Star this if you like it!

So just be honest with him. Tell him, "I don't want to break up with you, but I will be going next year - that's more important to me." Then it's up to him to take the next action; he can take it really badly (making it that much easier to end the relationship), or he can rise above himself. With a year to get used to the idea, he might even decide you're important enough to him that he'll come along.

In the end you can only be responsible for your own actions, not his.

[ Edit: Edited at Sep 11, 2006 6:37 AM by Sander ]

14. Posted by andyknott5 (Budding Member 2 posts) 12y Star this if you like it!


I can understand the situation you are in is difficult, but it's fair enough people saying 'go for it, you wont look back' - but you will. I had a friend who went out to oz expecting a years travel but came back after a few months because his ex who he left behind made him feel guilty, she kept crying down the phone telling him to come home. No matter how much you love or dont love the person, you will miss them, they have most probably been in your life everyday for the duration of your relationship.

what you'll have to do is tie up any loose ends in your relationship, and promise yourself that you will see out the whole year and have the time of your life. you'll have to be strong because you can only get the working holiday visa for oz once. If you dont do it - you'll be a forty year old woman who regrets and says to her nieces and nephews 'I wish I had gone travelling', when they're about to jet off from Manchester Airport.

'You only live once'

15. Posted by carosterns (Respected Member 159 posts) 12y Star this if you like it!

As I have already mentioned, GO.
I was on the receiving end of the stick when I was 22. My boyfriend left Oz for England and although I was invited to go, I stayed behind as it was the best thing for me at the time. We stayed in touch but eventually broke up. I'm now 40 and we are still good friends and chat regularly. I never held a grudge against him for leaving and he respected my career choice to stay behind. While in the short term it hurts, in the long term regrets will hurt more.

16. Posted by WONDERBUS (Budding Member 30 posts) 12y Star this if you like it!

12 years ago I left a girlfriend of 2 years to go and travel for 12 months. Nothing at all was wrong with the relationship, on the contrary. She didn't want to travel.... I did. We were were getting to the stage where we would've ended up getting married having kids, getting a mortgage etc. I put the brakes on and said to myself ' I have NOT lived yet.' In saying that I mean I hadn't experienced life to it's fullest extent and to experience life to it's fullest extent you need to travel. It doesn't matter how many books you read or tv shows you've watched about a country, nothing will ever beat throwing all of your senses into it by travelling through a country. By that I don't mean skimming the surface in the shallow end, by that I mean taking a high dive from the highest point of the tower into the deep end. It doesn't matter if you dive head or feet first, just as long as you dive. What's more invigouring, sticking your big toe into the shallow end of the pool of life or jumping head first from a 5 metre tower?

This will make or break your relationship.

When I returned home from travelling er after 1 year I was a completely different person because of my experiences. My girlfriend and I now had nothing in common at all. I had travelled the world and she and done the same thing every single day since I had left her. We couldn't relate anymore and we moved on. That's life. Some things are meant to be and some things aren't. There's only one shot at this life, so bloody go for it. Turn your phone off and change your email address if your girlfriend/boyfriend is sobbing down the line when you're in Oz. It'll ruin your holiday and adventure and do you head in if you have to constantly listen to that. It'll make you feel lower than a dog turd, and you shouldn't be made to feel that way by someone who is on the other side of the world, no matter who it is. Your head will be here in Oz and your heart will be back at home. To fully experience your journey your head and heart need to share the experience in Oz. It's a package deal and can't be separated.

Go with your gut instinct it'll never fail you.

I feel like I've lived and died 10 times over since the time I left my girlfriend to go travelling. If I had stayed with her there's no way I would have travelled another 3 times around the world and have grown into the person I am today. All I can say is thank God I bit the bullet and did it. Believe me, 12 years down the track you'll be saying the same thing too.

Good luck with your decision and where that decision takes you.

Life is made up of decisions and choices. Choosing to travel is a good choice.;)


17. Posted by annavict82 (Budding Member 47 posts) 12y Star this if you like it! in exactly the same situation. apart from my trip is booked and i leave in 2 weeks!!! my boyf of 3 yrs is up for a few nice holidays but nothing like the sort of things i want to do. believe me its not easy going, heart breaking in fact, but i am going with the hope it will be the best thing ive ever done. and failing all else i can come bk and say ive seen a bit, done a bit but prefer being at home. i somehow think my beach hut in goa will be more appealing advice to you?do it!!do it while u still can!!!!good luck and have courage. you will love it im sure (the words of advice i am trying to believe in myself right now):)

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