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returning home!!!!!!!

Travel Forums General Talk returning home!!!!!!!

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1. Posted by ontheedge (Full Member 90 posts) 10y Star this if you like it!

hi all, im over halfway through my round the world travels, currently in oz, and im dredding going home!, i really miss my family but home is so boring, i relize i have to go home because i have a flat which is currently rented out!, but i want to know other peoples experiences, how they find it when they get home!, and how you can cushion the depression of retuning to normal life!, my out look on my life back home has changed, i thought once iv traveled then thats it i have got it out of my system, but i love travelling and never want to stop exploring and travelling.

so how can i cushion the blow of going back home

what are your experiences of returning home after such adventures and travels

and what drastic changes did travelling influence you to do?

so lets have your thoughts please

2. Posted by Sander (Moderator 5236 posts) 10y Star this if you like it!

The biggest problem for many people upon returning home is that people there aren't really interested in your travels, nor can they quite understand how big of an impact they've had on you. They'll ask you how it was, and to share some tales - but after the first week or two, that's over, while it's still all looming large as life on your mind, and those two mundane weeks at home haven't left any impact at all.

Some people settle down back into their regular lives without any trouble - despite thinking how they wouldn't while still away. Others will never be quite happy again. The most effective way to cushion that seems to be to start planning your next trip away. :) (Sad but true.) - You can also try restructuring your life to contain more of the independence and just setting out on a whim and making your own decisions and planning ahead that travelling contained. I know that after travelling, a 9-5 job as an employee just wasn't for me anymore. So I set up my own business (freelancing), and although the necessity of the work still means the occasional stretch of 9-5 months, I'm just free enough this way that I can feel happy being at home. (Plus I earn enough and have the freedom in between projects that I can keep travelling.) Other people start working in the tourism industry themselves, or find some other way to integrate aspects of travelling into their lives.
Oh, and what always helps is to just remain active here at travellerspoint. :D Really, it does. Helping out others to have as brilliant an experience as you yourself had - a neverending stream of people who have a genuine interest in hearing about your travel experiences, and don't mind you waxing about Lake Tekapo for the ten-thousandth time, because for them it's the first time, and hey you know, that place sounds pretty good, and maybe they should go and make a point of it to stop there, too. ^_^

3. Posted by soupatrvlr (Respected Member 385 posts) 10y Star this if you like it!

Wow Sander, you really hit the nail on the head. I had a similar experience, although my friends and family were really excited to hear all about my RTW trip, the impact it had on my just couldn't be conveyed well enough. I stood in customs at the airport just inside the door for a good fifteen minutes before walking back into my old life...which I never truly settled back into ever again. I too started to freelance for myself so that I still get at least a couple of months of travel in every year if I can. I remember feeling depressed and lost when I first came home. I immediately started planning the next big trip and threw myself into making money so that it could happen. It helps to keep in touch with your new friends that you made along the road and TP is a big help to share your experiences, meet other travellers, and explore the world throught your laptop! You will be fine. Just keep looking to the next one and get to know us here at TP!

4. Posted by JackBauer (Budding Member 7 posts) 10y Star this if you like it!

When i returned home from my first trip abroad last month, i felt terrible

as soon as i step foot back at my parents house, i just wanted to back out there again.

luckily for me i've got a very long trip to europe planned for next week

5. Posted by james (Travel Guru 4138 posts) 10y Star this if you like it!

Returning home is bittersweet; probably more so the longer you've been away. It can be great at first to catch up with family and friends, and to see what's been going on, but that wears pretty thin after a while. As Sander said, many people and friends are not particularly interested in where you've been and what you've done. They'll listen for 5 minutes, then they'll expect you to shut up (yet surprisingly chew your ear off for half an hour about some minor detail about what they're doing on the weekend). It's mostly envy, with a little bit of 'can't-really-relate' to the whole travel thing. I found that some people are actually so insecure within themselves and their own little world that they didn't want to hear about the good things in other countries; "what's so special about that......we've got that here."

I've settled back down into normal life, but it hasn't been easy. I feel like an ex heroin addict that can never quite get the urge out of my system. It can be surpressed, but just when you least expect it you can overtaken by the urge to go somewhere else again.

6. Posted by tway (Travel Guru 7273 posts) 10y Star this if you like it!

Quoting james

I've settled back down into normal life, but it hasn't been easy. I feel like an ex heroin addict that can never quite get the urge out of my system.

So... we're all travel junkies? That sounds about right.

7. Posted by kathidi (Budding Member 51 posts) 10y Star this if you like it!

I was first hooked on travel when I was 16. I was an exchange student from the States, staying with a host family in Northern Ireland for the summer. We camped in Spain for five weeks and then drove home through Europe, pausing at a friend's farm in southern France. That was more than 30 years ago!

While in college, I lived and studied in Paris for a year. Every moment was romantic! And my husband and I backpacked through Europe before we had children. I took my children to Mexico, Central America, Hawaii, Italy and Greece, but I put off many of my real travel dreams for "later." I thought I had to. I thought I couldn't afford them. That was a mistake, and that's why I'm writing in response to your post, ontheedge!

Now my kids are grown up and travelling on their own, and I just completed my first solo travel to Asia. So I'm back! But I regret not going to some of those places I wanted to go. They were unknown destinations back then but now they are overrun with tourists. You can never recapture time, so go where you want to go. Most of us can take at least one trip a year, even if it means we don't accumulate material possessions "as expected!" Other people in your life will make you feel like your dreams are wrong - that you should want what they want. Don't let them make you feel like your desire to travel is selfish. It is pure spirit!

My travel experiences lead to my career and really made me who I am, which I think would be described as open-minded, compassionate and adventurous. Most people I know haven't really travelled (cruisers!) and they don't understand me. There is a deep well of experience that they can sense, but never see. I am different...that's why I like TP!

You're only half way through your trip so enjoy every minute. By the time you're ready to go home, you'll be making plans for your next trip. Travel will always be a part of your life now, so don't worry about it. Just love your family as hard as you can when you're home, tell them every day that you love them. Then go!

8. Posted by ontheedge (Full Member 90 posts) 10y Star this if you like it!

thanks for all your postings, i really appreciate your thoughts!-
i need to build travelling into my life! (maybe a job in travel), but i think being my own boss will help my travel, so i can take off when i want, im a self-employed joiner by trade but i dont get to travel much with that!, but i want to start property developing soon, so my thoughts are go home, part-time job (maybe in travel) and get a property to do-up, then either sell or rent it then take off again for 6 monthes!, and hopefully keep doing this un till im tied down to much i.e serious relationship, kids etc..-
also a few other ideas i have, are maybe buy a holiday home and rent it, the states look good, australia is to far!, but basically i want flexibilty in my life- keep your posts coming!!

9. Posted by jadeverell (Respected Member 255 posts) 10y Star this if you like it!

Last time i travelled I actually met a self-employed Joiner/carpenter who worked for 18months - 2 years, then went travelling for 6 months+. He said that he had been doing it for the last 10 years (think he was in his early 50's) What amazed me was that he was actually married and his wife stayed at home whilst he was travelling.
If you want to do a lot of travelling and work at the same time (obviously so that you can afford it) i think this approach is the best method. I am an IT contractor so float between jobs here and there and am just about to go on my 2nd adventure in 2 years.


10. Posted by peeps (Full Member 114 posts) 10y Star this if you like it!

sander really got it right,
the worst thing you can do is wax on about your travels to your friends who have never travelled more than a couple of weeks at a seaside resort. say you had a good time, maybe tell them one story and leave it at that. your bound to meet someone else whos travelled and wants to exchange stories.
the worst thing for me when i got home was i stayed with some friends from college in london for a week. i got so depressed seeing how their careers where flying while i felt like i was back at the begining like id just gotten out of college. i had to keep reminding myself that i hadnt waisted my time, i had done something different that they probably never would.
also you will be so much better off because you have your own flat. being broke and living back home with your parents is the worst.
iv been back 2 years and im hoping to head away this summer, iv left it too long. i gotta get the hell outta here;)

[ Edit: Edited on Feb 25, 2008, at 7:34 AM by peeps ]